If you’ve been with me for awhile, then you know I don’t like it when people ask me how much weight I’ve lost. So many judgments and so much other “yuckiness” follows that answer. I’m more than a number. Always have been. Always will be.
Some numbers do matter though. Some numbers tell a greater story than a number on a scale ever can. Last week I went in for a yearly physical. It’s been more than a year because that’s one of things I put off in the aftermath of my father’s death. I just didn’t want to deal.
I rose out of that slump though, at least for the moment! After my physical I went and had labs taken, and today I received the results—serendipitous timing.
I woke up this morning and asked for a sign. I asked for a clear and unmistakeable sign that my life was headed in the right direction. I’ve been making more changes lately and haven’t quite been sure of some of them. I’m working at taking life more slowly. I have been known to take on too much to prove a point to others, to prove a point to myself. I am, after all, the woman who once did four Bikram classes in one day and did not sit out one posture.
I’ve decided I don’t need to prove a point anymore, not to others and not to myself. I’ve been working at taking life more slowly, stopping to smell the proverbial rose. Taking time to just be.
This transformation is a process, like all transformations, so I have moments of insecurity, moments of “am I making the right choices?” Sometimes I forget a decision I make today can be undone tomorrow. Life is malleable.
I wanted reassurance from the universe that the choices I’m making are the right choices in this moment. So, when I went to my mailbox and saw that the lab had “mistakenly” sent my lab results to me instead of my doctor I knew the universe had given me an answer.
With a sense of urgency I opened the envelope and that’s when I saw EVERY SINGLE NUMBER, EVERY SINGLE TEST, fell well within the range of normal, of healthy. Not one number fell out of range. Line after line revealed healthy blood.
Those are numbers that matter. Blood doesn’t lie. Those numbers reflect efforts made in the hot room, on the hiking trails, and meditating, and healthier eating, and working on a healthier mindset.
Those numbers reflect hard work—health that I work for, that I fight for. Fight for yourself. Find some activity you love. Exercise will work for you if you love what you do. And don’t’ depend on others to do it with you. Do it for yourself and allow others to follow if it’s meant to be.
Follow your heart and your heart will lead you in the right direction.
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